Wired Woes

User: "i'm a new intern. i can't get email"
Me: "is your outlook 'online?'"
User: "no it's disconnected"
Me: can you access the internet?
*checking*
User: "no."
Me: go into network connections and check the status of ur Local area connection
User: "it says network cable unplugged."
Me: is your ethernet cable plugged in?
User: "...no"

Wireless woes

User: "I cant enable my wireless radio it says to hit fn and f2"
Me: "Hold down the fn key and type the f2 key once and then let go of both keys"
User: "I tried that, but I'll do it again."
Me: "OK"
User: "I did it."
Me: "Now go into 'View Available Wireless Networks' to see if you can see any networks."
User: "No, it says to enable the radio using fn and f2."
Me: "Go into the Intel utility and enable the wireless from there"
User: "I did that and it tells me to do fn and f2 again."
Me: "Hit THE FN key + F2 again."
User: "It doesn't work."
Me: "You're on a Dell laptop, right? Is your fn key blue?"
User: "They're white."
Me: "Tell me exactly what you're typing."
User: "The F key, the N key, and then the 2 key."
Me: ............................*click*

*I'd like to F key her!!*

That's HardCOREcore!

DILLON1383: so the new intle dual cores are sexy
DILLON1383: because the processor usage
DILLON1383: is out of 200% hahahhhaa
dularibeti: ooh wow!
dularibeti: lol!!!!!
dularibeti: lol
dularibeti: lolol
DILLON1383: man i am turned on haha
DILLON1383: thats is hilarous
DILLON1383: hilariously cool
dularibeti: HAHA YA IT IS
dularibeti: LOL
dularibeti: lol
DILLON1383: is like hahahahdaaaaaaaayuum

Dillon on the future of technology

After I mentioned to Dillon how we will one day be able to tell our kids about the time when emoticons were invented... This is what happens when two computer geeks start chatting.

DILLON1383: YOU are an emoticon
dularibeti: lol
dularibeti: drizzle have u ever used ethereal?
DILLON1383: etherwhoal?
DILLON1383: man by that time our kids wil be like what do u mean invented
DILLON1383: i thought God made emoticons
DILLON1383: like it'll be the only form of expression left lol
dularibeti:: hahahahah
dularibeti: lol
dularibeti: lolol
DILLON1383: we'll all just be uploaded onto servers
dularibeti: lol!
DILLON1383: and our bodies will be deleted
dularibeti: i kno rite
DILLON1383: so nobody will ever get sick
dularibeti: we'll be like the ppl who knew jesus
DILLON1383: unless they get Sasser
DILLON1383: LOL for real
dularibeti: hahahah sasser
DILLON1383: we'l be like i knew jack kilby
DILLON1383: :o
dularibeti: plus
dularibeti: we'll be like "i remember when mice came out!"
DILLON1383: LOLLLL
dularibeti: but by then there will be no mice.. they'll all be touchpads!
dularibeti: =-O
DILLON1383: srsly
DILLON1383: eyepads
DILLON1383: u just look at what u wana click on
DILLON1383: and think about what you wana say
DILLON1383: ur input device will be ur brain
DILLON1383: and the output device will be ur brain too lol
dularibeti: hahahah
dularibeti: lol!!!!!
DILLON1383: hehe srsly dude everyones computer will proly be inside them
DILLON1383: opens doors for them, downloads stock quotes weather, wateva
DILLON1383: some people will be computer "paranoid" and will have the computer on the OUTSIDE like a tiny dot in their pocket or something lol
DILLON1383: but for the most part everyone will be like a cyborg hehe
DILLON1383: and a slave to bill gates the XXXXXXX
dularibeti: hahahah
dularibeti: LOL
dularibeti: o man
dularibeti: i hope windows fixes its freezing and crashing problems then
DILLON1383: LOLLl
DILLON1383: have u seen the new mac pc commericals!!!
DILLON1383: hahah when the PC freezes!
DILLON1383: lol lol tell me uve seen it TELL ME!
dularibeti: hahahaha
DILLON1383: *shakes u*
dularibeti: yesss i have
dularibeti: hahahahahahah!!!!!
dularibeti: hjahahaa
DILLON1383: lol ok :-)
DILLON1383: the new imacs are..
DILLON1383: b b..b.ub bubuub
DILLON1383: BLACK!
DILLON1383: :o
dularibeti: NO WAY
dularibeti: duuuddeeeeeee i KNEW affirmative actiono would get to them too
dularibeti: more african americans are using macs nowadays
DILLON1383: lolllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
DILLON1383: hahahhahahahahahahhahahahah
DILLON1383: oh man thats hilarious
dularibeti: hahahah
dularibeti: dude it's true tho!!!

Vani's computer is constipated

XPunkin125X: dude i really need to fix my laptop
XPunkin125X: i need to clean it out..give it a laxative or something
XPunkin125X: u kno wa i mean
XPunkin125X: some sayna pad an sal in e rass
XPunkin125X: HAHA
dularibeti: hahahh
dularibeti: lollll
dularibeti: ewww